Mental Discharge

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#1 (42%)

Google's Retarded Censorship Machine Doesn't like My Opinions

8 months ago

The most prolific distributor of lies and propaganda on the entire planet says my inane takes are harmful.

#2 (21%)

The Concord Research Group Racism Measurement Test

03.28.2021

Take our specifically formulated and carefully constructed test that analyzes, scores, and rates your level of racism.

#3 (3%)

Call of Duty Thinks You're Too Retarded to Handle Foul Language

8 months ago

Go ahead and murder that guy. It's cool. Just don't say any mean things to him because it might hurt his feelings.

#4 (3%)

The New Mental Discharge Has Arrived for Some Reason

03.20.2021

After a long hiatus, a bout of lockdowns, a ton of hysteria, and a tiny burning sensation, Mental Discharge is back to give running a web site one more go.

#5 (2%)

Sell Me Your Product, Then Promptly Shut the Fuck Up

03.26.2023

Corporations seem to think they need to hold my hand and tell me how to live when all I want to do is buy their crap.

#6 (2%)

Dexter: New Blood is Yet Another Master Class in Failure

01.18.2022

Showtime fails its second attempt at giving a worthy ending to the horrific and exhilarating exploits of Dexter Morgan.

#7 (2%)

I Literally Just Broke Up With English

12.15.2010

I'm comfortable saying that I figuratively just broke up with English. What has English done, you may ask, to merit such scorn and derision?

#8 (2%)

Dr. Fauci Is the Scientist From The Dark Crystal

01.21.2022

Jim Henson's cult fantasy film was a warning to us all of our impending doom through the tales of his creative puppetry.

#9 (2%)
MSNBC

I Think MSNBC Has Turned Me Into a Super Gay Racist

12.01.2021

The constant badgering about how horrible I am for simply existing has finally made me change my ways.

#10 (2%)

Kawk Rings by Tad 2

08.18.2013

Our product engineers have painstakingly crafted a whole new series in our elongated line of famous jewelry for your jewels.

#11 (2%)

Promote an Open Business With Anti-Mandate Entry Signs

01.23.2022

Let patrons of your business know they can feel safe inside your establishment from the tyrannical posturing of worthless politicians.

#12 (2%)

Thanks for Ruining Jennifer Lawrence, Mr. iCloud Hacker Guy

09.06.2014

Jennifer Lawrence and her fellow celebrities aren't the only victims of this devastating attack on privacy.

#13 (2%)

She-Hulk Proves That in the Marvel Universe, Men Are the Enemy

08.20.2022

I may not know anything about comics or the Marvel universe, but I can easily spot a bitter, angry, insufferable woman.

#14 (2%)

Wearing a Mask in 2023 Is a Statement That You're Retarded

9 months ago

If you haven't gotten the message by now, covering your face with polypropylene from China is dumb.

#15 (2%)

The Curious Case of Ingesting Ivermectin

09.23.2021

Ivermectin may only familiarize patients with aisle nine at Tractor Supply, but no kidney stone should be left unturned.

#16 (1%)

Anal Beads are for Fat, Lazy, Stupid People

12.05.2010

It's become a startling fact that people these days are too lazy to regard sex with even the slightest bit of effort.

#17 (1%)

Kawk Rings by Tad

12.20.2010

The quality, performance, and longevity of our rooster rings can't be beat!

#18 (1%)

Terminator's Salsa-Savvy Savior: The Heroine of Dark Fate

11.07.2019

Terminator: Dark Fate's Dani Ramos is a taco-loving, quesadilla-crafting Latina who just so happens to possess an uncanny knack for escaping killer robots.

#19 (1%)

J.J. Abrams Killed the Star Trek Franchise

09.08.2021

The 55th anniversary of Star Trek is a bittersweet reminder of a science fiction saga that once expertly challenged moral, political, and philosophical dilemmas.

#20 (1%)

Teach Better Driving with Drive-By Road Rage Signs

05.11.2005

Help offending drivers take the guess work out of your vehicular discontent without having to brandish a firearm or baseball bat.

#21 (1%)

Teach Proper Parking with Parking Lesson Leaflets

07.18.2009

Provide those with poor parking skills the guidance they need using Parking Lesson Leaflets.

#22 (1%)

Six Silly Sanctimonies of Censorship

10.21.2009

Poorly executed attempts at censorship that only serve to promote the continued ignorance of society.

#23 (1%)

Men of Other Integrities

02.18.2009

You can enjoy the exact same self-appreciation for mediocrity, but you don't have to be married to enjoy it.

#24 (1%)
AP

Thanks for Nothing, Rigas!

08.21.2002

Hey, Rigas! That pitiful 6 a.m. perp walk from your New York high rise drove the Dow up 489 points.

#25 (1%)

Meet Your YouTube Commenters

02.03.2009

Now that your video has been featured on the main page, let's meet your YouTube commenters.

#26 (1%)

CockBlocker™ Revolutionizes Online Dating

07.10.2003

CockBlocker™ cuts through the artifice, getting the real story on Mr. Right.

#27 (0%)

I Had Your Mom Last Night

01.07.2004

On a night ordinarily scheduled for Bingo, your mother receives intense sexual bliss and steamy passion she has yearned for nearly a decade.

#28 (0%)

Displaced Rainforest Animals Enjoy Basking in the Sun

10.04.2003

Less than a century ago, exotic plants and animals struggled for survival in dense rainforests. Now, scientists can learn so much from creatures once off-limits to the world.

#29 (0%)

My New Robot Can’t Fucking Kill Anybody

06.20.2003

Disappointment looms over the inability of AIBO to hunt manflesh.

#30 (0%)

The Official Guide to IRC L4m0rs

03.31.2002

Strap on your lame-proof goggles and prepare to dive into the Mental Discharge l4m0rdex.

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