Archives
New MAHA Mountain Dew Flavors Help Ditch Disease
RFK Jr. going to war with the food industry means the folks over at Mountain Dew need to come up with a new game plan.
The New Mental Discharge Has Arrived for Some Reason
After a long hiatus, a ton of hysteria, and a tiny burning sensation, Mental Discharge is back to give running a web site one more go.
There Is an Epidemic of TV Hosts Who Are Complete Pussies
The arbiters of late-night are no longer in the business of entertaining audiences, but instead looking for their shoulders to cry on.
Call of Duty Thinks You're Too Retarded to Handle Foul Language
A franchise built on the horrors of war will make the experience safer by punishing those who fight with words.
Wearing a Mask in 2023 Is a Statement That You're Retarded
Some people still have yet to learn that covering your face with polypropylene from China doesn't impress anybody.
Everyone in the Airport Restroom Has Ass Cancer
Our bathroom sanctuaries have fallen victim to the clutches of diabetic Americans boasting more rolls than a Texas Roadhouse.
Sell Me Your Product, Then Promptly Shut the Fuck Up
Companies and their product advertisements need to stop berating my heritage and just tell me if it comes in black.
She-Hulk Proves That in the Marvel Universe, Men Are the Enemy
I may not know anything about comics or the Marvel universe, but I can easily spot a bitter, angry, insufferable woman.
Promote an Open Business With Anti-Mandate Entry Signs
Let patrons of your business know they can feel safe inside your establishment from the tyrannical posturing of evil politicians.
Dr. Fauci Is the Scientist From The Dark Crystal
A cult fantasy film made by Jim Henson about puppets suffering in a chaotic world accurately portrays the insanity of today.
Dexter: New Blood is Yet Another Master Class in Failure
Showtime fails its second attempt at giving a worthy ending to the horrific and exhilarating exploits of Dexter Morgan.
The Curious Case of Ingesting Ivermectin
Ivermectin may only familiarize patients with aisle nine at Tractor Supply, but no kidney stone should ever be left unturned.
J.J. Abrams Killed the Star Trek Franchise
The 55th anniversary of Star Trek is a bittersweet reminder of a science fiction saga that no longer challenges moral, political, and philosophical dilemmas.
The Concord Research Group Racism Measurement Test
Take our scientifically formulated and carefully constructed test that analyzes, scores, and rates your level of racism.
Six Silly Sanctimonies of Censorship
Poorly executed attempts at censorship that only serve to promote the continued ignorance of society.
Teach Proper Parking with Parking Lesson Leaflets
Provide those with poor parking skills the guidance they need using Parking Lesson Leaflets.